For Better or Worse

I haven’t blogged in a while so this post is definitely overdue.  I’m going to give myself a break since school and wedding planning have consumed my life.  Not to mention listening to nightly baseball games and attempting to get back in to running.  It seems like I constantly have something to do, which is good because it has helped the time away from Steven pass relatively painlessly.  The last two months have also brought the start of a new show, “Don’t be Tardy for the Wedding”.  Those of you who know me know that I have few vices.  I don’t smoke or gamble, and rarely drink or curse, but Mt. Dew and the “Housewives” tv shows get me every time.

Kim, the star of the show, is going over vows one day and starts in on the “in sickness and health, richer or poorer” and stops because she says she doesn’t like negativity in her vows.  I get what she is saying; who wants to think about the bad things that life might bring on such a happy day.  The truth is though, life can bring some hard times and one of the blessings on a marriage is that you will have a partner to help you through.  I mean, that is kind of the point of those vows; letting the other person know that you will always be there for them.   

I know every life and marriage has the possibility of things going wrong but I have to wonder how many people really believe any of it will happen.  Two of my friends got married in the last year, both teachers.  Did either of them think about what would happen if he broke his leg and was done working for the year?  If he got fired?  If he was forced to teach across the country?  I doubt it.  Those things don’t happen in most careers.  I think instead couples embrace marriage and accept that there could be a few bumps along the way. 

There are a few situations where the negativity in those vows is especially important and a baseball marriage is one.  I can guarantee there will be bad calls, bad games, bad fans, bad road trips, and even bad teammates.  There will be injury, minor or career ending, and there will be trades, releases, and who knows what else.  Baseball has provided us with some situations that have been testing of us individually and as a couple and will continue to do so.  

The thing about the vows is though that once they are said, there is no turning back.  There is no “the distance isn’t working” or “the measly minor league salary isn’t enough”.  You know getting in to it that the negativity in those vows is a reality and you’re going to be there and be his biggest fan anyway.  There are many people who will be around for the success and the good times, but I think it’s important to say, up front, I’ll be there when you can’t get out of the first inning, I’ll be there if you have a surgery and need a nurse, I’ll be there if we spend our savings chasing the dream and end up broke.  Of course I’ll be there for his MLB debut, when he signs a big deal, and has a jersey retired, but I think we all already know that.  What we really need to hear is the first part, the reassurance, that no matter what, we have someone to turn to. 

I have no idea when or where Steven and I will end up saying “I do” but I do know that when the time comes he can count on me to say every line.